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April 02, 2004




ode to my potato gun

This is an old prose poem I wrote; man, that was kind of a long time ago.

Some parts are funky, I may have to re-master it to flow a little better at some parts.

Travelling about
This village of Pitzer,
I've seen many a joints
And many a beer.
I've seen Jack'o Daniels
Roam the halls of this land.

Thus I've found my good friends:
Boredom and Disgust,
And together we've conjured
And planned fun for us.

It began once a day
When the three of us sat,
And Disgust was struck
By a thought in his hat.

"We must do evil things!"
He shouted aloud.
"Yes!" followed Boredom,
"And do it with smarts
And the skill from our brow!"

I knew what I had to do.

I dialed to whom I could trust
To be my right-hand man
For my right is in pain.
T'was David the Great
Whom which I was seeking.

He knew of my plans,
And he knew of my ways.
"Hark! Let us go!
Let us go and be Great!"
Said he with a roar.

So us four,
We went out
To a land far away.
We went a great distance
To our companions' dismay.
We went to HomeBase
Without losing face,
And brought back some pipe,
Sending my checkbook to waste.

Now many go thinking
That we be like fools--
Buying ABS pipe
To be fresh and look cool.
But, hark!
For you've yet to know,
That this ABS makes potatoes go!

So I built this great gun
To shoot up some starch,
For folly and fun,
Then went on a march.

No potatoes would fly
For my gun would not shoot
Not one night nor second
What a waste of my loot.

But that second a time,
On that strange spring a night,
Camp. Sec. came a wheelin'
Much to our fright.

They looked at us strangely
And wondered perhaps
That we're Harvey Mudders
Being nerds such as that.

"Alo! We be nerds!
But we be not Mudders
And although we dost not look it
We're from Pitzer in fact."

So we talked for a bit
As I worried much so
About my tuition
And where my gun'd go.

They took her away,
My project--they did.
Those bastards be scand'lous
And ignorant of my science.

So I walked to the Dean
That very next day
And that bloody bastard
Wanted little of my ways.

"That thing there is scary
And cannot be good
I know not how it works
For I am a fool."

He said this to me
As I mumbled and groaned
For he'd not give me permission
To do this here at 'home.'

But he'd get back my gun
To shoot her abroad
But yet to this day
I've seen not my beauty
Of plastic that awed.

Comments

"Now many go thinking
That we be like fools--
Buying ABS pipe
To be fresh and look cool."

cool!

#156 - Posted by: Carol at April 6, 2004 05:42 AM

I repeat...you should use lighter fluid for combustible and make sure to shake it up so that it atomizes...not ever seeing the design you used I couldn't troubleshoot your device any better...ahhhh those were the days ;)

#161 - Posted by: at April 11, 2004 08:40 AM
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